Tease & Denial is a tingling BDSM practice that increases pleasure, sparks the imagination and allows even beginners to get started safely. In this guide, you will learn how to play the game of arousal, control and conscious denial in a sensual, consensual and responsible way.
The roles are clear: a dominant partner leads, a submissive partner follows - and the moment of orgasm is solely in the hands of the dominant person. It is precisely this suspended state of closeness, tension and desire that makes Tease & Denial so intense.
- 1 This is what Tease & Denial is all about
- 2 What is teasing?
- 3 How to increase pleasure
- 4 Video: Tease and denial - secrets of pleasure play
- 5 Orgasm control & frustration with Tease & Denial
- 6 Don't be afraid of blue balls
- 7 Tips for all levels - Tease & Denial step by step
- 8 Role play step by step - depending on the level
This is what Tease & Denial is all about
With Tease & Denial, you consciously bring your partner to the threshold of orgasm - just to pause there. Arouse, stop, start again: This game of waves intensifies every sensation, every touch and every look.
When the climax seems within reach, you interrupt the game. You let the body slide down again before lifting it up again. The more often these waves are built up, the more intense the final release becomes.
The result? A physical rush that intensely bundles emotions and pleasure.
What is teasing?
In the context of BDSM, teasing means: stalling, teasing, arousing expectations - and then breaking them in a controlled manner. You play with your partner's hopes that they will come. But the decision is yours alone.
Teasing is often associated with orgasm control: You make it clear that pleasure is a gift - by no means a given. Many combine this game with chastity cages, bondage or rituals.
You decide how much pleasure you grant and how much you deny. This creates a special mental stimulus that gets under your skin and can captivate you in the long term.
Tip for advanced users: Use Chastity cages or restraints to intensify control.
Tip for experienced users: Work with rituals, fixed rules and longer periods of chastity to deepen the game emotionally and mentally.
How to increase pleasure
Tease & Denial thrives on creativity. Anything that builds arousal but doesn't lead to the end is suitable for your game.
- Surprises: New lingerie, a change of outfit or an unexpected appearance can trigger a strong surge of arousal.
- Voyeuristic moments: Do it to yourself and just let him watch - without letting him touch you.
- Targeted touching: Bring him hard to the brink of orgasm - and then stop abruptly.
- Chastity control: A cage prevents any secret discharge.
You can even let him masturbate until the first drop of pleasure - then stop him, tie him up or put the cage back on.
Video: Tease and denial - secrets of pleasure play
In the following video, BDSM expert Nika Macht explains how to build up arousal, maintain tension and control orgasms. Ideal for anyone who wants to delve deeper into this art.
Orgasm control & frustration with Tease & Denial
This BDSM practice is particularly suitable for beginners because it can be increased slowly. Nevertheless, the following applies: withdrawal should never become permanent.
If the submissive part is held back too often, it can lead to frustration. Talk to each other openly - the part who is denied should also experience pleasure, excitement and ultimately fulfillment.
Don't be afraid of blue balls
Strong arousal without discharge can lead to blue balls - a brief overstimulation with a slight blue tinge and a feeling of pressure.
This sounds dramatic, but is harmless. After an orgasm, the blood flow quickly returns to normal. Some BDSM fans even find this pressure additionally arousing.
Tips for all levels - Tease & Denial step by step
- Observe closeness: How does the body react?
- Stops at 70-80% arousal.
- Short games, clear safeword.
Level 2 - Advanced:
- Use of restraints, blindfolds, positions.
- Repeated waves of arousal.
- First chastity phases of 1-2 days.
Level 3 - Experienced:
- Longer chastity phases, rituals, psychological control.
- Combined play with CBT, Nippelklemmen or Light Pain.
- Deeper mental dominance & emotional guidance.
Role play step by step - depending on the level
- Name roles (Dom/sub).
- Clear rules: no touching without permission.
- Simple commands: "Hands behind your back", "Don't come".
Level 2 - Advanced:
- Use of chastity devices or bondage.
- Scenarios: Teaching, questioning, control.
- Longer periods of teasing with breaks.
Level 3 - Experienced:
- Deep power play, emotional guidance, rituals.
- Psychological teasing: words, looks, expectations.
- Control over time, position, permission & discharge.
Frustrierend und lustig :p
Ich habe das mit meinem Mann ausprobiert, nachdem ich Euren Beitrag hier gelesen habe. Was soll ich sagen ... Wir werden noch üben müssen. Zuerst war mein Mann total angepisst, weil ich ihn geil gemacht habe und ihn dann hab sitzen lassen. Er verstand nicht, warum ich das tat. An dem Abend war dann die Luft raus. Beim 2. Versuch erklärte ich ihm, was ich vorhabe. Das machte ihn so geil, dass er trotz verbot einfach kam. :/ Wir werden es weiter versuchen. Bs jetzt ist es etwas frustrierend für ihn und nur lustig für mich :D