Pegging sounds like a daring kink - in reality, this role reversal in bed can be incredibly intimate, bonding and pleasurable. In this Pegging guide, you'll find out what's behind the practice, how to broach the subject respectfully and how to move step by step from the initial idea to a fulfilling shared experience.
The focus is always on consensus, communication, safety - and a good dose of curiosity about new perspectives on pleasure.
- 1 What is Pegging anyway?
- 2 Why Pegging appeals to many couples
- 3 The strapon at Pegging - variations and differences
- 4 Pegging addressing - without pressure, but with clarity
- 5 Safeword, consensus & communication - the basis for Pegging
- 6 Important tips for the active woman during Pegging
- 7 The receiving man - devotion, prostate & new orgasms
- 8 Tips for all levels - Pegging step by step
- 9 Cruel Reell about Pegging - first-hand tips (Video)
What is Pegging anyway?
Pegging describes a sexual practice in which the woman penetrates the man anal with a strapon Often Pegging is part of an erotic role reversal: she takes on the active, more dominant role, he lets go of control, experiences submission, intense prostate stimulation and completely new feelings of pleasure.
The term originates from the English-speaking BDSM and sex community and has long since found its way into the bedrooms of curious couples. Pegging can be romantic and tender, playful or much more dominant in the sense of femdom and power games - the important thing is that it is right for both of them.
Why Pegging appeals to many couples
- New perspectives on pleasure: Men experience their prostate as a "male G-spot" - often more intense orgasms, different body perception.
- Role reversal & power games: She becomes an active lover or dominatrix, he surrenders - a classic BDSM element.
- More trust: Those who open up to anal not only reveal a lot about themselves physically, but also emotionally.
- More equality in bed: Both experience what giving and taking feels like - physically and mentally.
The strapon at Pegging - variations and differences
At the heart of Pegging is the strapon. Even though people like to talk about "the" strapon, there are different designs that feel very different - both for the active woman and for the receiving man.
The strapon is classically a strap-on dildo - but the term is now a bit of a misnomer, as there are several variants:
- Strap-on with harness: A dildo is clamped into a harness or trouser system. Advantage: very good control, different sizes, depending on the model also with vibration or extra stimulation for the wearer.
- Strapless-strapon: This strapon is partially inserted vaginally and held in place by the muscles. This way, the active partner is also stimulated while she penetrates.
Which variant is more suitable depends on your bodies, your experience and your style of play. For beginners, a classic strapon with a harness is often easier to control.
Pegging addressing - without pressure, but with clarity
The fantasy is there, but how do you approach Pegging without running over your partner? No matter which side the desire comes from - it's important to have a calm moment without pressure.
- Timing: Talk about it first outside of the hot situation, e.g. over a glass of wine or after a nice sex session when you feel close.
- I-messages: Phrase your desire as an invitation: 'I'd be interested in Pegging...' instead of 'You should try...'.
- Curiosity instead of performance: Emphasize that it's not a test, but a joint exploration: You can stop at any time.
- Define boundaries: Talk about taboos (e.g. no deep penetration, no pain, no humiliation - or vice versa) and define a safeword.
Safeword, consensus & communication - the basis for Pegging
Precisely because Pegging involves anal penetration, prostate stimulation and often a clear dominance/submission dynamic, it belongs in the realm of BDSM and kink. To keep everything pleasurable, you need three basic pillars:
- Consensus: everyone involved consciously says "yes" - without pressure, without manipulation. An "I don't know..." is not a clear yes.
- Safeword: An agreed word (e.g. "red") ends the game immediately. "Yellow" can stand for "please slow down/differently".
- Aftercare: Cuddling, talking, having a drink, stroking - after intense sessions, the body and mind need attention.
Important tips for the active woman during Pegging
When you as a woman take on the active role at Pegging, you are both the enjoyer and the person in charge. You control the pace, depth of penetration and intensity.
The most important rules at a glance
✅ Use plenty of Anal lubricant - anal intercourse without lubricant is quickly painful and can promote injuries.
✅ Stretch slowly - with one finger, then two, possibly small anal toys. The sphincter muscle should be given time to let go.
✅ Start small - choose a small one first strapon, you can increase the size and hardness later.
✅ Penetrate slowly - the receiving partner exhales deeply while you go deeper, inch by inch.
✅ Pay attention to body language - breathing, muscle tension, sounds: they tell you whether you should change the speed or pressure.
The receiving man - devotion, prostate & new orgasms
For many men, Pegging is initially more challenging mentally than physically. Shame, role models or fear of losing control can get in the way - and this is precisely where the special opportunity of this practice lies.
- Practice surrender: Take your time to get used to the feeling of fullness and the role of the recipient.
- Discover the prostate: Pleasant pressure on the anterior intestinal wall (towards the abdomen) can lead to intense wave orgasms.
- Combined stimulation: Many men particularly love Pegging when the penis or testicles are stimulated at the same time.
Tips for all levels - Pegging step by step
Level 1 - curious & cautious
- Read the guide together and watch the video below.
- Clarify boundaries and taboos, set a safeword.
- Start with Anal fingers and small toys, without penetration pressure.
- Only go as far as both feel relaxed and curious.
Level 2 - first Pegging experiences
- Choose a small strapon and work extensively with lubricant.
- Comfortable position: e.g. the man on his side or on his stomach, she behind him.
- Penetrate slowly, breathe a lot, maintain eye contact or hand contact.
- Take a break shortly after each penetration and let your body get used to the fullness.
Level 3 - intensive role reversal & BDSM feeling
- Experiment with larger strapons, longer sessions and clear power dynamics.
- Integrate elements such as commands, titles ("Mistress", "Femdom", "My Toy") or light bondage.
- Test prostate stimulation with different forms of movement: gentle thrusting, circular movements, holding and pulsing.
- Plan intensive aftercare after the session - cuddling, talking, praise, perhaps a shower for two.
Role play step by step - depending on the level
- Soft scenario: You play "curious lover". She introduces him slowly, whispers soothing words, he describes what feels good. Perfect for first attempts.
- Mid-level scenario: Femdom setting light. She sets the pace and position, sets the rules ("You only speak when I ask"), but remains affectionate and attentive.
- Intensive scenario: He is her "toy" or "sub", she wears strapon and perhaps matching lingerie or harness. Commands, light spanking or bondage can be added - always with a safeword and prior agreement.
Cruel Reell about Pegging - first-hand tips (Video)
So that you are even better prepared and the Pegging becomes an intense experience for both of you, we have invited a real expert: Cruel Reell. In our exclusive video, she gives you her best tips for getting started with Pegging and shows you how to make this special form of role play safe and pleasurable.
- How do you find the right strapon for you both?
- Which lubricants and aids are really useful?
- How do you take control as a dominatrix without overwhelming your partner?
- Which tricks can be used to stimulate the prostate in a particularly targeted way?
In this video, you'll learn everything you need to know to discover Pegging as an enriching part of your relationship - from preparation to more advanced techniques.
Watch the video with Cruel Reell and discover Pegging from a completely new perspective!
Are you curious?
Are you fascinated by the idea of pegging or would you like to try it yourself? If your partner or femdom is also interested - why not? With the right strapon, enough lubricant, clear communication and a good safeword, Pegging can turn from a taboo into a pleasurable, intimate journey into a new role.
Thanks to the right accessories and a conscious, consensual approach, you can expand your sex life - away from habits and towards curious discovery. And maybe swapping roles in bed is just the bit of freedom you've been missing.
Thanks to Cruel Reell for her valuable insights!
