Spanking - the pleasurable spanking of the bottom or other parts of the body - is one of the classics in BDSM. For some, it's a threat ("I'm about to spank you"), for others it's pure erotic tension, power play and devotion. In this guide, you'll find out how to get started safely, which positions are suitable and which spanking toys are available.
Spanking toys to get you started
Do you want to try spanking or make your sessions more varied? Start with these categories:
- All spanking toys at a glance
- Paddle - flat strokes & good control
- Flogger - lots of soft welts instead of hard hits
- Whips for more intense spanking sessions
Tip: Always start with your hand and only then increase to paddles or floggers.
The term spanking
In spanking, the partner is deliberately hit - usually on the buttocks, sometimes also on the thighs or other well-padded parts of the body. This can be done by hand or with various aids such as a paddle, crop or whip.
Spanking is not uncontrolled violence, but an agreed role play with clear boundaries, a safeword and mutual trust.
Active & passive pleasure in spanking
Spanking can give pleasure to both sides. The active part (top, dom, mistress, master) often enjoys the aspect of control, power and leadership. The passive part (bottom, sub, slave) experiences submission, surrender and the thrill of pleasure and pain.
For some, the pain stimuli are clearly in the foreground. For many others, the pain is more of a means to an end - the power differential and the feeling of being led or chastised is more important.
Dominance & control during spanking
Spanking becomes even more intense and controlled with the right bondage equipment:
- Handcuffs - securely fix hands
- Ankle cuffs - restrict freedom of movement
- Bondage ropes - classic bondage play
- Bondage sets - everything in one package
Always ensure good blood circulation and check the restraints regularly.
The pleasure of spanking
The pleasure gained from spanking usually occurs on two levels:
- Physical: pain stimuli, pressure, heat and afterburning on the skin.
- Emotionally: power imbalance, shame, trust and the feeling of being led or held.
Many find even a light slap on the bottom or a gentle slap with the hand extremely arousing. Others use paddles, floggers, crops or whips to experience more intense stimulation.
Important spanking tips for beginners
If you are new to spanking, communication is the most important thing. Talk in advance about which parts of the body are allowed to be spanked, how hard you want it to be and which safeword to use.
Especially at the beginning:
- start with the hand
- increase slowly
- Ask regularly ("Is that okay?")
- pay attention to body language (tensing, ducking away, breathing)
Gentle introduction
Particularly suitable for beginners:
Practice slowly before increasing the intensity.
Popular spanking positions
Popular positions:
- Above the knee: controlled, intimate, psychologically intense.
- On all fours: optimal access, ideal for variations.
- Standing: perfect for floggers, crops and whips.
Accessories for role play
For greater immersion in roles:
Masks increase feelings of shame and control.
Sex toys for spanking
Toys differ in terms of material, surface area and flexibility - all of which influence the intensity and sensation of pain.
Spanking categories at a glance
Here you will find all the important tools:
The smaller the striking surface, the stronger the effect.
Apply the right amount of force
Warm up the skin before hitting harder. Start lightly and increase slowly. Observe reactions and ask questions.
- Only hit soft areas of the body
- Never hit the spine or kidneys
- Take regular breaks
- Cane, bullwhip & hard tools only with experience
After the spanking - aftercare
Aftercare is important for confidence and well-being:
- gently stroke or massage
- cool if necessary
- cuddle, talk, come down
- Feedback for the next session
More knowledge & guides
More tips and information:
Theory + practice ensures safe and pleasurable sessions.
Spanking macht richtig geil
Spanking macht mich richtig geil! Es gibt in so vielen alltäglichen Situationen die Möglichkeit, mit Spanking zu beginnen. Oftmals reicht es schon, mit dem Partner zusammen Mittagessen zu kochen. Dann hängt dort verlockenderweise ein Geschirrtuch. Etwas zusammengezwirbelt kann das ordentlich auf dem Hintern zwicken. Ein kleiner Spaßgeht dann schön in sexuelle Lust über. Wir haben aber auch ein ganzes Arsenal an Toys, wie Peitschen, Riemen und Co. Abwechslung der Toys bringt immer wieder neue Lust zum Vorschein. Spanking wird gewiss niemals langweilig.